ME. kynzgerl
CODES. manikka
BRUSHES. 1 2
IMAGES. 1 2
The 2 paper heart: moargh.de
SOURCE. BLOGGER BLOGSKINS IMAGESHACK

exams overrrr!! haha bt theres no feeling of freedom no smell of that! cause im launching in productive and useful events and activities in my life that may benefit the rest of my life lol zz haha like driving! i have finally launched into practical driving lessons like omg luh! and i have to check the mirror, blind spots, control gear and clutch brake accelerator i dunno haha its like damned multi-tasking lah! nw i know being a driver is nt easy and its quite tiring lol so my dream will nt be to own a car and drive it myself bt actually knowing how to drive and having my own car bt letting someone drive for me,preferably an experienced chaffeur LOL ok so it sort of boils down that im lazy.sigh besides this i have to be diligent in grooming myself and remembering yog stuff turning up for yog and giving up my saturdays! so thats like half the wk gone! and i need a job,pronto! bt nw we have been thru the student and low pay life im more picky abt the pay where i work and whether my job scope is impt enuff to be filled in my resume and the reputation of my company.sigh. so far its these 3 thats occupying my time now bt i hope to get more done! like a routined fitness regime and extracting my wisdom tooth, polishing my teeth and getting a scalp/hair treatment to make my hair healthier i think its becoming more brittle ): and having a strict beauty regime..catching up on shows, exploring places..and gg to resorts world/universal studios etc..well we shall see huh! bt rt after exams im glad i finally went for K-ing(like omg luh since march i have been having this intense desire) finally..then went to the lovely hort park for our lovely picnic which my dear friends qq and mx have alrdy uploaded! (: love the grass wished i could go barefoot and just run on it and everything bt theres this irritating reptile/lizard/iguana/whatever that is running across this nice pasture when we were just starting to take off our shoes! stupid. then we gave up.the place is so serene.it just looks more urbanised yet pretty in that sense while botanic gardens has this more rugged feel more nature bt nt pretty its more of like nature. so in terms of beauty i choose hort park if its accesibility i prefer botantic gardens cause its so near to orchard! after so much nature can go fareast shop and eat at pastamania LOL! haha (: cant wait for a zoo trip with my dear QQ! bt thats in august..wait long long..):

zz so long since i blogged and my blogger went bonkers the other time that i lost my long post!sigh recently i have decided to become more independent because of an incident with a friend bt shall nt mention it here, and i hope i really do! like more self assured of doing some things that im nt familiar with and ultimately becoming familiar.first thing to overcome is my fear of jamming the library's printers and photocopiers i dunno why whenever i use it alone some problem will occur! i swear its nt me! lol well that shall be the first step! gg to simei cc and starbucks alone shall be my nxt step.sigh! which means drinking teachat alone..haha god i sound like a total loner! well i think i actually am! ): maybe i wasnt one in the past but im seriously growing to be one! like how im slowly and nw almost totally liking to take public transport to and fro school alone like how i dislike having a conver on the bus and having everybdy listening to it( i dunno! i like them private) and having convers on the train when all i really want is to sleep or read my book. i think being a loner also involves some element of self centredness and of course the better part(self assurance)! i dunno some ppl just dun get it they talk non stop and worse! abt things im nt interested (self centred me!) and sometimes im really tired and when u stay awake its like when the needy people comes u have to give up ur seat(i know i know bt lugging a heavy bag and a lifeless soul isnt exactly the best time for me to really stand and squeeze amongst the crowd for an hr on the train)ok self centred again! aargh. sometimes when i go to class i would just like to talk to my closer friends and just ignore the rest of the class like making small talk..talking to ppl left out in the class to make them feel better(thats what i do in the past cause i hate that feeling) and joking with ppl when all i really want to pay attention/do my work/just zoning out. somehow i just feel these ppl arent worth my effort that much cause they are just hi-bye ppl and some dont even care abt u in truth. so why make the effort? perhaps im feeling really exhausted deep down already with ppl? with the superficiality? with homework? with life? i dont know. i do really feel exhausted deep down really. sometimes u make time out for people bt people take it for granted. this time i really want some me time maybe its a struggle admist all these hi bye ppl we meet. just look at ur contacts list and make out how many ppl can actually be on ur speed dial when u need someone to talk to abt ur problems, someone to just have dinner with u tmr. thats what i call MY FRIENDS. the others sometimes i dunno why they exist and when we do really meet up its like a yearly event and we start going on on how much we miss each other and everything when i dun miss them at all how can i miss u when u din even appear significantly in my life before? i have been having this kind of feeling recently for abt 2 weeks already maybe this reveals why i have stopped making an effort. maybe. and this in turns cause me to slip into loner mode even more easily even more readily. bt right now.im totally alright being a loner. (: is that what they say just do what u feel like doing?hopefully all will turn out better. (: im having a mock exam tmr morn and a report due on thurs(which i havent started at all) and here im!

haha the stupid photo refused to load even after i tried like so many times!so aargh!forget it! lol i shall try it next time! recently theres alot on my to-do list not done i dunno whether its me or what but its frustrating! like ok i wanted to cut my hair at toni and guy theres a card thats allows me to enjoy a complimentary haircut but i cant seem to make time for it! its like 10am-2pm which is an awkward timing to wake up cut hair then come home cause the academy is in bugis.and the slots is like whoa!all snapped up! like i called on friday and the whole of nextwk is like full! like grr.then i tried calling my usual haridresser and she is like yeah full also! like what the!is it like the haircutting season now? zz! so thats my first thing wanting to do for v long but still haven been done!! ZZ! second thing is i need to do some uni tuition fee stuff but need my parents to go along w me and my parents are only free in the morning! i tried to booked them and TOLD them lets go this wed k they say ok ok but when i woke up everybdy's out alrdy! its like double ZZ so left with this fri since tmr im gg sentosa.its quite frustrating cause i need to go out also and the uni thing is like hindering me lah! cause if im off for morning activities i cant come back in time and if im gg out later i need to finish asap like by 12noon or sth so i hao bu rong yi find a day!! and its the weight and worries thats manifesting in my brain tht i wished i can take that off my todo list! third thing is my contacts! i keep wanting to settle this also but the optical shop closes early so by the time i reached home from work bathe and go to the shop its like closing soon..i wonder how working ppl ever make it to banks and optical shops.AARGH!! and the thing is i dunno how long these things last so i cant plan my schedule properly. and theres gss right now,ending on 31st july so theres like a mad rush to shop AGAIN.i really hate to rush! 31st july is like this fri lah! haii.so my todo list is like ever growing! OK. I SWEAR IM GG TO SETTLE THE UNI STUFF THIS FRIDAY.but i cant squeeze in others leh! AARGH!!! sian.i shall go draw up my todo list properly on paper NOW.

hey hey im back!recently realised my to-do list is LONG! haha i shall try to fulfil! haha!
work is getting tiresome and i am facing with lesser and lesser ppl i miss my colleagues! haha!
heres a photo of the bday celebration of theng and mf! (:had fun that day! fish and co really nicer than manhattan! but service not v good initially! and the glasshse is absolutely nice!

im suddenly checking out ss501 haha! cause im suddenly in love with the songs from boys over flowers!again..ya i know.haha UR MAN sounds not bad! and check out jihoo wearing specs in YOU ARE MY HEAVEN lol.
todays my medical checkup and the urine test was done in an ignorant way(i mean everybdy not just me k) lol but not gross ah just that everybdy quite helpless lol but surprisingly the nurses are mostly quite friendly! im truly surprised. haha but it was super efficient excpet the xray waiting part and i saw tons of ah thiongs sian. looks like theres not gonna be any shuai ges.zz.
HA.but guess what! i saw qiqin! and seok kian!too bad din see wanling! haha,and qiqin seemed really nice and friendly hope we can be classmates and she wont find me weird then. LOL haha! and the xray gown is free and quite comfortable leh actually! and sandy's father was damned nice to drive us to and fro,saving me my transport fare! and i embarrassingly fell asleep in the car in the morning! LOL i am not sure whether they noticed! lol and he looks quite friendly at first i thought he will look intimidating! looks like my fears are unfounded! (:
AND FINALLY i tried butter manju cake!! i have been wanting and desiring for that since jc days i keep telling my classmates but after sch the queue was v long! and nobdy wanted to queue but today i decided to queue for me and my mom! i bought 4 two for red bean two for custard! i like a mix of both! the red bean was sweet and zhen cai shi liao!and custard was surprisingly not coyingly sweet! so mix! haha but my mom found it ex! its $1.30 each for a teenypiece.and the dough quite common,u can actually taste similar ones from mr bean and a shop in taka basement! (: haha so bu zhi de! but nice.
bought a new bread from yamazaki in tampines one.tempted by the eclairs! gonna try it! haha its called black seaseme bread! (:
OH and btw i keep having bizzarre and vivid dreams past few days/.i dreamt that i was walking past tpjc but goodness knows why im wearing tpjc uniform.the time period is now so i couldnt be schooling,then i saw my juniors carrying sth heavy then i helped them with it,and ended up past a classroom then saw my classmates they keep exclaiming eh u look like huihoon! eh look! look at her eyes looks like right! then i dunno why i cant tell them im huihoon but after all the exclaims i couldnt take it i whispered to myself,ya im huihoon what.in a very soft tone.then one of my classmates heard,then he ran after me and shout my name looking for me,but i ran out all the way to another building and he followed,and i keep turning around,trying to avoid,but the building had alot of complicated maze like looking things i just keep anyhow turning then when i was safe,i feel safe,i squat down and cried,the i woke up le.weird right! lol

recently very disappointed with a friend,thought shes usually the sensitive,supportive one because she herself also dont want to be treated that way,but well,she totally disappoints me and im really more disappointed than angry,and i realised disappointment affects more badly than anger cause anger can subside if the person cheers u up and u forget abt it,and its a momentarily thing.but once disappointment sets in,it wont be lifted easily unless u regain the trust in that person.so right now,i dunno why,even though sometimes when we talk she makes me laugh,but i now feel like i cant tell her anything except superficial things like what i can tell everybody in general,like we became from good friends to now merely friends.i feel like shes so nonchalant that shes not even making an effort but she tells everybdy she is.i cant even feel it.but at least i know i got other friends who really care abt me! (: and im quite glad for that.because of this incident,it inspired me to write somethings.i wrote nice things each close friend did for me that it major and significant in my heart,like unique incidents and special qualities.it made me appreciate my friends.